A Letter To My Toddler Son

Dear Darling Toddler Son of Mine,

My Love, there are so many concepts that I wish I could convey to your little developing mind. How much I love you, how happy you make our family, etc. However, there are a few basic ideas that, for your best interests, and for mine, I really wish I could get you to understand. Like, immediately.

Repeating myself has not worked. I see other moms who seem to be able to communicate with their toddlers, trick them into doing what they want, etc. But you and I haven’t been meeting eye to eye too much lately, huh? I like to write… would that help? No, no, it won’t. Because you’re two. But, you know what? I feel crazy enough today to try, just to make myself feel better. So, humor me, and let me share with you some ideas that I really, really want you to just get. I swear, you’d be happier, too, if we were just on the same page.

1. The baby will get sick if you snotstream and slobberspray all over him. You have had a constant stream of mucous coming out of your nose (which you insist on wiping away with your hands) as well as a chronic cough since October 1^st. If you snotstream and spray your slobbery cough on your brother, he will get sick. Just like the 500 other times he’s gotten sick in his 3 months of life. Sick baby means stressed out mama. Is that fun? No. So please refrain from further snotstreaming and slobberspraying. Use tissues. Cough into your elbow. 
   
2. I don’t know which “blue cup” you’re talking about. Please stop wailing, “BLUE CUUUUUP!!” I’ve given you all the blue cups that exist in the house. WHICH BLUE CUP?!?! 
   
3. The baby needs to sleep. Please, please let me do the whole rocky/shushy/patty thing to get the baby to take a nap, and then we can PLAY! Haven’t you noticed that if the baby is wailing, Mommy is too distracted and we can’t PLAY? Stop hollering and please stop climbing on me, the baby (go get a tissue!), his crib, and-- COUGH INTO YOUR ELBOW!!! In a few months we’ll get our Ferber on in this house, but for now, if you would just give us enough peace to get the baby to sleep, I swear it will be worth your while. 
   
4. I have significantly lowered my expectations for your consumption of fruits and vegetables. I am now asking that you eat exactly four peas. Four. And then I will be appeased enough to give you a massive cookie just like the one your big brother likes to conspicuously enjoy in front of you. EAT THE PEAS AND YOU GET THE COOKIE. It’s so easy. Do it!!

These are the ideas from today, my Love. I’m sure there will be more tomorrow. Will I do any better conveying them to you? Probably not. But I think I’ve gotten the whole, “I love you so much” thing across, right? And I know you love me too. I’ve got the snotstream all over my shirt to prove it.

With lots of love and hugs and kisses,

Mom

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What are some ideas you want your child to just get? Share them in the comments section.

I'm on Scary Mommy! :)

Scary Mommy is a funny parenting website that I started reading frequently when nursing our newest baby. I submitted this article to them on a whim and I couldn't believe it when I received an email from the editor the next day saying that she was going to schedule it for publishing. The post has been shared 50,000 times on Facebook! It's been wild to see such a response.

My beginner's luck inspired me to write more and that's how this blog came to be.

Here's a link to the post that started it all. Enjoy :)

3 Reasons Why You Can Totally Handle a Third Baby

Highly Effective Strategies for Ending, or Extending, Your Child's Nap

It would be nice to just let a baby figure out his or her sleep schedule, but we all know that's not always practical. Therefore, it is wise to familiarize yourself with strategies that will either end, or extend, your child’s nap when necessary. Moms usually discover their own successful methods fairly quickly, but for you newbies out there, here are some surefire techniques to get you started.

Strategies for Ending a Child's Nap:

• Step into the shower. This strategy is especially effective when you first spend 10 minutes debating whether the baby would sleep long enough for you to complete said shower. You must be wet, and to be safe, lather up your hair nice and sudsy.

• Make a nice hot cup of coffee. The aroma cues your cutie that it's wake-up time.

• Get into your bed. Every new mom learns that the oft-quoted advice, “Sleep while the baby sleeps,” is really code for, "Let's get that baby up and at ‘em!" As soon as you get cozy in your bed, she will want out of hers. A word of caution: you may find that this strategy actually extends the nap if you suffer from momsomnia. Lying awake worrying about your kids, all the mistakes you’ve made, and/or what you need to do actually prolongs your child’s nap. If you find yourself in this situation, your best bet for ending the nap is to get up with the intent of doing something relaxing and/or productive. That should do the trick.

• Start cooking something on the stove. You know, something that will burn if left unattended but not come out right if you stop the process midway. Risotto, anyone?

• If you have more than one child, get them all asleep at the same time. As soon as you realize that you have a moment to yourself, someone will wake up. Easy peasy.

• If all else fails, try thinking to yourself, “Wow, I’m surprised [insert child’s name] is asleep." Boom. Naptime is over.

Strategies for Extending a Child's Nap:

• Watch as the clock ticks closer to the time you need to leave the house to go to an appointment, get the older kiddos from school, or go wherever you need to go when no one is around to babysit. In these circumstances children can be counted on to sleep as if there is nothing else in the world to do, and they will not transfer to their car seat without waking up. And screaming. And wanting to eat.

• Read email and check Facebook. These activities feel just enough like wastes of time that the sleep gods will extend the nap long enough for you to feel suitably guilty for not making better use of that time. Be careful: as noted above, once you make an attempt to be productive, the nap will end.

• During your kiddo's most inconsistent naptime, have somebody else watch him. He'll sleep.

• This one requires a sacrifice, but if you are breastfeeding, you'll be able to extend a nap whenever you need to leave your babe and want her to wake up so that you don't have to deal with the hassle of pumping. She will snooze her way right through the whole process (but be forewarned that she will likely wake as soon as you squeeze out that last drop). Note: this strategy is usually even more successful when the pump parts require washing first.

• If your child falls asleep in your arms and you want to do something else--anything else--he will continue to sleep and you won't have the heart to wake him, nor the courage to try to put him down in his crib. This is a particularly effective strategy if you are hoping to engage in any of the activities listed above as effective strategies for ending a nap. So what do you do in a circumstance like this? Forget the other stuff. Enjoy the moment. Those snuggles are heaven-sent and don't last forever, so soak them in while you can.

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What "works" for you? Share your no-fail methods of ending, or extending, your child's nap in the comments section.

What does the title "Sandboxes and Sticky Back Felt" mean?

Sandboxes and Sticky Back Felt symbolize how I've come to approach being a mom to my kids. I'm not saying that anyone else should approach motherhood in this way, and I'm not saying that I am this kind of mother all the time, but after 5 (blessed) years of being a mom, I've learned that this approach feels the best to me.

I want to enjoy my time with my family and try to make it special for all of us.  However, I know that if I go crazy with grand ideas, or if I try to do everything perfectly, I'll be a big stress-ball.  My family won't want to be with me, and I won't want to be with them. That's where Sandboxes and Sticky Back Felt come in:

Sandboxes...

My toddler is incredibly lovable, but incredibly active, too. It's hard for me to keep him entertained all the time, and I find it hard to "enjoy the moment" when he's overwhelming me with his energy, or having a temper tantrum.  The sandbox is one of the simplest things I have that keeps him busy and happy.  It's no big deal for me to bring him out there, and when he's there, I can delight in watching him play, discover, and have fun.

and Sticky Back Felt

My oldest kid really loves the PBS show Wild Kratts.  On the show, 2 animal-loving brothers have special "Creature Power Suits" and technology that allow them to take on animal "creature powers."  Oldest Kid was about to turn 5, and we were going to have family over to celebrate.  I knew he would love for it to be a Wild Kratts party.  The plan was to keep it simple with whatever food he wanted to serve (you know, hamburgers or pizza or something), some Wild Kratts games I found online, and a cool cake made by his Memere.

I wanted to keep it simple, but I also really enjoy planning parties. I like putting together special touches that the guests, especially the guest of honor, will enjoy, and I like to be creative and crafty.  As I was planning, I couldn't stop thinking that the kids would love to have Creature Power Suits like the ones I saw on Pinterest and some of the mommy blogs out there.  But the thought of making them overwhelmed me, especially since a lot of the moms used actual fabric-store fabric and sewing machines to make them.  I figured I could skirt around that issue by cutting up tee shirts if I could find them cheap enough, but what about the special design on the front?  What would I use to make it?  If I used felt, would it take me forever to trace and cut the patterns?  And then what the heck would I use to glue them to the shirts (cuz there was no way I was sewing anything...)?  The whole process had enormous potential to be a big stressful pain in the neck that would keep me up late at night and near to tears if whatever glue+felt+tee shirt formula I came up with didn't work.  With a round-the-clock nursing newborn, I just couldn't afford to do that.

I took some "me" time (with a baby, of course, but nevertheless) and went to the craft store to see what I could come up with.  It was then that I discovered Sticky Back Felt.  Genius.  Seriously, cue the choir of angels.  It's a sheet of felt with adhesive on the back.  The paper on the other side of the adhesive made it easy for me to trace the designs, cut them, and slap them on 8 shirts in the time it took me to watch two episodes of Modern Family. It was a simple yet creative outlet that I really needed that week, and it allowed me to do something for my sons and their cousins that they all really enjoyed.  It made me feel good, and they had fun.

And that's what the idea of Sandboxes and Sticky Back Felt comes down to: I want my kids, my husband, and I to enjoy each other's company, and I want to do what I can to make our life special and fun, but no one's having fun if I'm stressed.  When I stick to the simplicity of things like sandboxes and sticky back felt, things go okay.  We enjoy each other, and I can see the fun and humor in the life that we share.

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How do you find the fun and humor in parenting? What do you do to keep things simple? Please share your ideas in the comments section.